Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Please silence your phone

Dear Cell Phone Addicted Students,

Why, oh, why, do you insist on putting your phone in a bag under your seat or out in front of you? I don't mind during lecture when your phone goes off. In fact, I giggle at your ringtones.

But dear god, during an exam, when you set it to vibrate, please keep it nearby. Please be able to reach that precious phone of yours that keeps you connected to the outside world and makes you feel loved even during a crucial exam. And please, please, please, reach out to your only lifeline and push the silence button. It will be there when you return, safe, sound, and unharmed.

There is absolutely no reason for me to end up between two of you social addicts who have your phones set on vibrate at the highest level during said time. There is no reason for me to be able to see your bag moving from the intense vibration, nor should I be hearing it every 30 seconds as your phone reminds you that you might have a voicemail or text message from someone you deem highly important but was likely a hookup from last weekend, a roomie you talk to every five minutes anyway, or a telemarketer that makes you feel special.

I will give you credit for coordinating your vibes, though. Betwixt the both of you, there was a maximum of 10 seconds between vibrations throughout the entire exam period. One would "ring" for a while as a call came through, and then do the appropriate reminders every 30 seconds. As there was a deadening silence, the bag three feet away would jump in and pick up the slack. I thank you for providing constant annoying background noise and for giving me this topic worthy of its own pet peeve post. But I've had my please make the proper adjustments next time. In the future, I may not be able to resist reaching into your oversized floral print bags and fixing the buzz myself.

Yours truly,
The girl sitting between your unappreciated vibes

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